Mention the words surrogacy agency, and no one will probably even think of making the connection with single men. However, this most left field of pairing is the rising trend in surrogacy, with more single men choosing to be intentional single parents.
Can’t Wait for Ms. Right Any Longer
According to many surrogacy agencies, the spike in single men seeking their services is not rocket science. They simply want to become fathers. In fact, majority of these men say that they have always known, even when they were still children themselves, that they wanted to have kids. But for various reasons – their career taking priority, not meeting a partner that wants a family, legal considerations in their home state or country – their dream of fatherhood remains unfulfilled. Many, in fact, find themselves already in their late 40s (with some even approaching retirement age), worried that their biological clock cannot wait for Ms. Right any longer.
Childcare requires a lot of energy and a shared concern among aspiring fathers is that they will not be able to keep up with their kids, if they simply keep on waiting. They emphasize, however, that not having a partner to have kids with is not for lack of trying. Indeed, a lot of them have dated or have been in long term relationships before even considering surrogacy as an option.
Parenthood Is Not Just for Women
Some say that men cannot be good parents because they are not nurturing like women or that children need mothers instead of fathers to grow up well. It is prevailing gender stereotypes like these, that have caused many single men to struggle with having their own family through non-traditional ways such as adoption or surrogacy.
In a 2011 study done by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, it revealed that single parents contributed to a quarter of adoptions in that year. However, the huge gap between women (13,331) and men (1,415) who adopt, clearly illustrates how gender bias has prevented single men from making a family through adoption. By challenging common gender misconceptions, this surrogacy trend has also opened up a discussion on society’s expectations on what a family should be.
If you are a single man thinking of having a baby through a surrogate, consulting with a reputable surrogate agency should help prepare you on what to expect.
Sources
How single men desperate to become dads are investing up to $175,000 in surrogacy procedures, Dailymail.co.uk
Single men turning to surrogates, CNN.com
